Blake Bouldin

Don't Worry Be Happy

One of the things that my dad would say to me growing up is "let your walk, match your talk".  I have always taken that statement very seriously.  Now that I am a pastor and am talking every week about spiritual matters, making sure that what I say is what I do is even more important.  It hard though.  In fact, recently as I have been talking to the congregation about worry and anxiety, I have found myself struggling in that area.

There are a number of things that people worry about, but for me, especially in my role, one of the things that causes me to have anxiety is the past.  I mean, if anyone would have told me all the things that I would be experiencing in the 7 years of pastoring before I started, I would have called them a liar.  Make no mistake about it, being a pastor/leader is very rewarding, but it is also tremendously challenging.  These past 7 years have been tough!  And just like success can lead to overconfidence, challenges can lead to hesitancy on the part of a leader. And the bottom line is this: Hesitant leaders aren't effective. 

Here's why.

#1 Hesitant leaders begin to be more concerned about what people think and want than what God wants.  I was having a conversation with one of my elders recently and we began to talk about several hard decisions we are going to have to make in the near future.  Frankly, neither of us want to make the changes because we understand that not everyone will like them.  However, people pleasing should never be the driving force of spiritual leadership.  Spiritual leaders should always be more concerned about pleasing God and if decisions that are made will ultimately take us to where God is leading then those decisions have to be made.

#2 Hesitant leaders procrastinate.  There are a whole lot of people that procrastinate, but when leaders procrastinate, it doesn't just effect them personally, it effects those whom they are leading.  I sincerely believe that procrastination is one of the subtle tools that Satan uses to keep people from being all that God wants them to be.  When leaders are worried about what "might" happen next they procrastinate and say to God by their lack of moving ahead, "Lord, I am not sure I can really trust you." 

#3 Hesitant leaders become motivated by fear instead of faith.  Hebrews 11:6 makes it clear that without faith it is impossible to please God and yet there are so many times when pastor/leaders throw faith to the wind and operate out of a sense of fear.  I have experienced this first hand and have seen it repeated in the lives of many other pastor/leaders I know.  When this happens, more often than not, leaders end up doing things that are easy and safe, rather than counting the cost and acting in faith knowing that God will reward their efforts.  Doing the right thing, and acting in faith, even when it's hard is the essence of true leadership.  I like what Andy Stanley says about this concept, he says, " When you find a man or woman who will do what's right regardless of what it costs personally, you have discovered a leader worth following."

I want to be a leader worth following.  I want to act by faith and not by fear.  Pray that I will be able to do that!  I will pray that for you too. 

Have a great weekend. 

Blake

Here is a shout out for one of my favorite people!

I got an e-mail from my sister Betsy today. I wanted to post it because it provides a link to her "new" blog.  Little did she know that I had already visited her blog and loved it!  It is so her...obviously right?  I love the music too.  I don't say this enough, but I love my brother and sister and have so many wonderful memories of both of them.  Their spouses and children are also precious to me.  Betsy, you don't have to be cool or informative for me to read your blog....being a great sister is enough! 

Here is the e-mail she sent me.  If you check out my blog, I would love for you to check hers out too!

Hi Blake and Brent-

It's official that all the original Bouldin kids have a blog now!  haha   I decided to join you both in the blogging world.  But my blog is nothing like either one of yours & will probably totally bore you both.  (I'm not cool & informational or inspirational!)  Just wanted to let you know, though, & give you my link to my much girlier blog! 

http://atimetoloveatimetolearn.blogspot.com/

ttyl!

Betsy

PS...that is my arm around her in the picture...love you Betsy!

What Did Jesus Say?

Photo by Asbo Jesus 

Disturbing Results and Tough Questions

Angie and I were watching Charles Gibson last night on the ABC News and he commented about a new survey that specifically deals with religion and faith in America.  If you want to take a look at the survey go to www.abcnews.com and you'll find it.  I went to the site and was blown away by what I read.  Here is what I found to be the most shocking: "More than one quarter of American adults have left the faith of their childhood for another religion or no religion at all.  Factoring in moves from one stream or denomination of Protestantism to another, the number rises to 44 percent.  Further one in four adults ages 18 to 29 claim no affiliation with a religious institution at all."

.

Now how could this be? Interestingly, I recently read an article in the magazine "Off The Agenda" by a church leader named Reggie McNeal.  Here is his evaluation of why religion and the church in America is experiencing such a massive decline.  He says, "All over North America churches and church leaders are busy addressing the wrong questions.  Answering them not only won't address the critical issues facing them, it will, in fact, compound the wider church's dilemma and hasten its slide into spiritual obsolescence in the emerging culture."  He then goes on to say if the church/faith is going to recover then "church leaders must be willing to challenge the status quo and be ruthless in their analysis of both the situation and the results."  In other words, church leaders MUST begin to ask the "right" questions.  What are those questions?  Take a look at what he says.  I agree with him 1 million percent.

1. WRONG QUESTION: How do we "do church" better?
2. TOUGH QUESTION:  How do we "be church" better? Or how do we deconvert from "churchianity" (institutional religion) to Christianity (the movement)?

1. WRONG QUESTION: How do we grow this church?
2. TOUGH QUESTION: How do we serve this community?

1. WRONG QUESTION: How do we develop ministers for the church?
2. TOUGH QUESTION: How do we develop missionaries to the culture?

1. WRONG QUESTION: How do we develop church members?
2. TOUGH QUESTION: How do we develop followers of Jesus?

1. WRONG QUESTION: How do we plan for the future we see?
2. TOUGH QUESTION: How do we prepare for the future God sees?

1. WRONG QUESTION: How do we develop leaders for church work?
2. TOUGH QUESTION: How do we develop leaders for the Christian movement?

7 Deadly Sins

I was reading a blog today called Sunday in the South and came across this information.  It seems that Forbes Magazine has listed the cities that are committing the 7 deadly sins most often.  Where do you think Charlotte falls and what do you think the "deadly" sin that we commit most often is?  Read on.

Forbes.com has come up with some maps showing the locations of the top 10 US cities involved in the seven deadly sins. Memphis, TN made the list three times!

#1 Avarice: San Jose, CA
#1 Envy: Memphis, TN (Charlotte, NC, ranks #2)
#1 Gluttony: Memphis, TN
#1 Lust: Denver, CO
#1 Sloth: Memphis, TN
#1 Pride: Salt Lake City, UT
#1 Wrath: Detroit, MI

Changing from me to we

One of the things that is happening right now at WCC is that we are becoming more strategic in how we do things.  There are a number of reasons for that, but our primary goal for changing is so that we can more effectively accomplish our mission of reaching people and helping them grow as Christ followers.  For that reason, change is good!  However, the downside to change is that when any organization begins to change, friction occurs.  For whatever reason, there are some people who just don't like change.  We have seen that at WCC some recently.  For instance, when we've asked people to move away from the very back and move toward the front, we have received resistance.  Another great example of this is our attempt to move away from the 9:00 connection classes and instead utilize that time to train leaders.  When we made that decision, some people have complained.  Believe me, I understand that there are valid reasons why some folks like to sit in the back.  And I am sure that some feel like taking away the 9:00 hour limits their ability to study the Bible and be with friends.  So what do we do?

Well, I could write for days about this, but one simple solution is to adopt a WE verses ME mindset.  I am sure most of you that attend WCC and have heard me say this phrase over a gillion times, but here it is again, "it's (meaning our existence here on earth) is not about you". No God has strategically placed us here, not only as individuals, but as a Church body so that WE might reflect Him and bring Him glory. And one of the things that the scriptures says brings God glory is reaching people who are far away from Him. Jesus was all about seeking out those who did not know Him. And since, as Christ followers, our job is to become more like Christ, that is where those of us who know Him should place our focus. And realistically, there is no better opportunity for us to do that corporately, than on Sunday mornings.  My goodness, can you imagine the impact that WE would have if everyone of us who have made Christ the Lord of our lives woke up each Sunday recognizing that WE have an opportunity to positively impact someone far away from God when they step inside the doors of our church?  It really would be an unbelievable environment with an unbelievable impact.  But it starts with a WE mindset which , in my opinion, is so much more Christ honoring than, wondering why the leaders of the church have chosen to make a change that may not suit me. Listen, here is a promise: If the mindset that "Church is all about ME", became the mindset that "WE can change the landscape of our community", WE would!  I really believe that.

Over these next few months our church will continue to change.  And, I am pumped about the potential WE have to see God change people's lives.  I hope everyone at WCC will feel the same way.  Through Christ, WE can do immeasurably more than WE could ever hope for or imagine.  Believe it!  I do.

unchristian

I am reading a book right now by David Kinnaman called unchristian.  The point of the book is that Christians are supposed to represent Christ to the world but unfortunately according to the research Kinnaman has done, something has gone terribly wrong.  Young Americans today, when asked about their impressions of Christians, use words like these: judgmental, hypocritical, and insensitive.  I HATE all three words.  I am saddened that we Christ followers are thought of in this light.

One guy named Jeff in the book, when talking about the judgmental nature of Christians, said this:

"Christians talk about hating sin and loving sinners, but the way they go about things, they might as well call it what it is.  They hate the sin and the sinner."

If I am being honest, I have felt the way Jeff feels many times.  I mean even though I am a committed Christ follower, there have been countless occasions where I have seen the approach Christians take toward "perceived" sin and "sinners" very counterproductive.  We laugh at the quote "turn or burn" but the fact is, that message has permeated our culture to such a degree that it has turned many people away from even wanting to consider Christianity as a possibility for their lives. In essence, the mindset has become, if "turning" means I will become more judgmental, hypocritical and insensitive toward people, I would rather risk burning.

There is Hope however.  Kinnaman has found that even in the midst of these tough realities of being prideful and judgmental, that many of those who aren't Christ followers are still receptive to the input that we have to give. In other words, while they are repelled by rejection and an air of superiority, they are attracted to acceptance and genuine respect.  The question then that needs to be answered is: What does this respect look like?  Here is what Kinnaman says people want.

1. Listen to me.  Talk less and listen more.  That way you can understand what I really need.

2. Don't label me.  Using words like "lost", "pagan", "non-believer" are not endearing at all.  We are people just like you.

3. Don't be smart. Please don't act like you have all the answers.  You don't! Besides, we aren't always looking for the so called "answer" as you might presume.

4. Put yourself in my place.  Don't be so concerned about what I do or don't do.  Try and understand where I have been and what I am going through so that you can better understand my choices.

5. Be genuine. Don't try to wedge your beliefs or your spirituality into my life on every occasion.  Agendas are not something that interest me.

6. Be my friend with no other motives. Pray for me, serve me, love me...but don't do that as a scheme to achieve your desired goal.  If I sense that, I am done!

Anger is ugly!!

When I saw this video it reminded me of what we discussed Sunday about anger.  Anger is a killer.  Just watching this made me want to say to this policeman.  Stop. Just Stop!  And then Ask why am I so angry? And what is it that I want to accomplish?  Listen to the young man.  He may not talk like you think he should, but the word "Dude" isn't exactly the epitomy of disrespect. And then finally, Rethink.  A policeman's job is to protect and serve.  Protecting and serving are not what I see in this video.  Check it out and let me know what you think. I will warn you this police officer uses a profanity.

Random Thoughts....

I thought Sunday was a good day.  I love seeing our youth helping out with our children. 

The Middle School Basketball team that Brett Vines and I coach for WCC is absolutely tearing it up.  We are now officially 7-0.  I don't know if this is good or bad, but we beat a team so bad Saturday night the other team's coach got mad at Brett and me.  What do you do? I blamed it on Brett and his over the top competitive nature. Ha.....

We have more new faces walking through our doors recently at WCC than we have ever had in the life of our church. Thank you for investing and inviting!!

I had a friend of mine attend church on Sunday for the first time.  This guy is studying to be a minister and so he spends a lot of time checking out other churches.  I asked him to grade us out.  He used the word UNBELIEVABLE to describe his experience.  I love that compliment!!

Are Mary Padgett and Marty Montague blowing the top off or what?  My goodness they are getting the job done with our children!  Sunday, I asked my 9 year old son Brad and his friend Logan what they thought of the children's experience and in their exact words they both said, "We loved it!"  You have no idea how much that rocked my world.

I have enjoyed our series on anger these past two weeks.  This week we are going to start a series that deals with fear and anxiety.  If the response is anything like I have received as I have talked about anger, it should be a great series to help people deal with some significant stuff. 

Frankly, I am blown away by the relevance of the Bible.  I mean, I have grown up being taught the Bible, but each time I begin to study a different topic, it amazes me that I haven't found one yet that the Bible doesn't address.  The Bible is not an antiquated, out dated, irrelevant book no matter what anybody says. 

I love the way our greeter team has stepped it up lately.  I have heard that people make a decision about whether or not they will return to a church they are visiting within the first 5 minutes.  Having a greeter team trained and doing their job is so important.  I am so thankful for those we have at WCC.

Speaking of being grateful, I am so grateful for Weddington High School.  When I think about the fact that they have allowed us to basically take over their school every Sunday for the last 6 years, it blows me away.  This Sunday we are planning on taking up a love offering to show our appreciation.  I hope you will come prepared to be generous.

Woke up this morning to a phone call from my sister in law.  She informed my wife and me that my father in law had been admitted to the hospital with chest pains.  I spent the day with him as he had a plethora of tests run.  Everything checked out OK.  Thank God.

Last but not least, my son Brett, pictured at the top of the page, made the Sun Valley Middle School baseball team.  Those of you who know me well, know that that was a huge prayer request of mine.  Brett was in need of a self esteem boost.  Apparently God decided to give him a double dose of good news.  Not only did he make the baseball team, but he also was selected to be on an All Star basketball team in his rec league.  Does it seem like I am bragging?  I am!  I am so proud of my boy!

My Starbucks was lukewarm

My Starbucks coffee was lukewarm this morning.  It's never happened before, but when I put the cup up to my mouth expecting a piping hot sip of coffee what I got was a lukewarm cup that almost made me want to throw up.  I was so disappointed and so surprised.  You see, Starbucks has a reputation and when I go and pay my $1.87 for a grande coffee of the day just black, I have expectations.  When they aren't met I feel like I have been jipped.

I think people feel that way when they come to church.  Seriously, I am convinced that whether people have ever been to a church before or are professional Christians, when they walk through the doors of a Church, I think they have expectations. And what's more, when those expectations aren't met those same people feel jipped.  In fact, I am going to go as far as saying that one of the main reasons I feel like Churches all across America aren't reaching more people is because they have become more concerned with the experience that people have when they come rather than the expectations they come with.

So what is it that people expect? We talk about relevant worship experiences and great programs which invariably puts the pressure on the staff to "perform".  But I am convinced that there is more to what people expect than we realize.  Let me mention two things that are on my mind that deal with with this issue.

1. I think people expect CONVICTION.  Let me ask you, have you ever been to a concert or a ballgame where the people in the stands acted like they could care less?  I have and it stinks!  I can remember several years ago sharing season tickets to the Panther games when they went 1-15.  Seeing all the empty seats and disinterested fans made me hate even going.  I think there are probably a whole lot of folks that feel that way about going to Church.  Who wants to be a part of something that people aren't excited about themselves?  Who wants to worship and give praise to God when everyone else acts like they could care less?  You know sometimes I think we worry so much about offending people by being over the top in our approach to Almighty God, when the truth is, a whole lot of the people who we worry about offending are surprised and offended that we're not more over the top. Don't get me wrong, I am not talking about some of the crazy antics we've all seen on TV and elsewhere.  I am talking about people who sincerely approach God with the mindset that He is truly deserving of ALL our praise and adoration.  In my humble opinion, anything that we REALLY care about we are convicted about, and my goodness, the God of the universe ought to be at the top of our list of convictions. Frankly, I think people who walk in the doors of Churches, whether they verbalize it or not, want to see a group of people who are serving and praising God with full out conviction.

2. I think people want to be told the TRUTH.  If you have ever been in sales you have probably heard of a sales approach called the "Back Door" approach.  When sales reps take this approach what they try and do is get their customer to lower their guard by talking with them about everything other than what they came for so that their customer will begin to feel comfortable. When the sales reps senses that the customer is comfortable, he/she then goes for the kill.  I was in sales for almost 10 years and I hate this approach.  I hate it because when someone is trying to sell me something, I want to be told the truth up front about what the sales reps intentions are. Subtly getting me to lower my guard seems deceptive.  I think people that walk through the doors of any church expect that same kind of truth telling from its leadership. In other words, I think people would rather the leadership of the church say things like God expects you to give and God expects you to serve and God expects you to commit.  When leadership says these things up front rather than caudling people with a good experience in the hopes that they will reciprocate by doing what God wants them to do later on down the line, I think it makes a statement. Now, I am not saying that Churches shouldn't create excellent, Christ honoring environments.  The experience is important too. But leaders need to be honest with people up front and tell them God expects you to tithe, and God expects you to serve, and God expects you to be full on committed.  People want to be told the truth and Christ followers ought to tell it.  It is truth worth telling.

I have heard people say that they go to Starbucks for the experience.  Maybe they do, but if Starbucks continually serves lukewarm Coffee, it won't be long before those same people will be looking elsewhere. The same is true with the Church.  People talk about the experience, but what they really want are people worshiping and serving God with full out conviction, and leaders willing to tell the truth.