Blake Bouldin

I Am Gonna Miss This.....Beautiful Girl

This past Saturday night was my daughter Brianna's junior prom.  I couldn't believe my eyes when she walked down the stairs all dressed up.  I literally thought to myself, who is this beautiful young lady.  My goodness where does time go?  It seems like just yesterday that Sissy was playing with baby dolls and wearing her hair in pig tails.  Now it's prom dresses and talk about which college she will attend. 

Trace Adkins wrote a song called "You're Gonna Miss This" that Angie and I love.  I thought of the lyrics Saturday night as I watched my little girl drive away with her boyfriend to enjoy a night on the town.  I was so happy knowing that she was going to have the time of her life.  But I was also sad realizing that before I blinked an eye she would be out of the house and on her own.  A big tear is running down my cheek even as I write this.  Maybe I am an old "fuddy duddy" but I am gonna miss these days and my baby girl.

You're Gonna Miss This by Trace Adkins

She was staring out the window of that SUV
Complaining, saying, "I can't wait to turn 18"
She said "I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules"
Mamma put the car in park out there in front of the school
Then she kissed her head and said, "I was just like you"

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are the good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Before she knows it she's a brand new bride
In a one bed room apartment, and her daddy stops by
He tells her "It's a nice place"
She says "It'll do for now"
Starts talking about babies and buying a house
Daddy shakes his head and says "Baby, just slow down"

Cause you're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater
Dog's barkin, phone's ringin'
One kids cryin', one kid's screamin'
She keep apologizn'

He says they don't bother me
I've got 2 babies of my own
One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe but...

You're gonna miss this
You're gonna want this back
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast
These are some good times
So take a good look around
You may not know it now
But you're gonna miss this

Thoughts from a 16 year old Christ follower

My sixteen year old daughter Brianna was asked to write a paper about what she thought about Christianity.  This is what she wrote.  I thought it was very provacative and insightful.

Maybe it is because I have grown up in church, or maybe it is because I hear about it in the news all the time, or better yet, maybe it is because my dad and my grandfather are both pastors of local churches, but the fact of the matter is that I have been subject to Christianity every day of my entire life.  From the day I learned to talk, it has always been, "Pray before you eat," and "Have a quiet time," and "You better not use God's name in vain," and all of that has been fine with me.  It wasn't until I grew up a little and noticed that everyone was not like me, nor did they believe the same way I did that I started to investigate why in the world anyone would turn away from the only religion I ever knew.  As soon as I started to look, it became very prevalent that people of the Christian faith are the antithesis of what they are truly supposed to be, and if I was on the outside looking in, I would want nothing to do with the so-called Christians of today.

Christians have, over the past years, isolated themselves from the rest of society.  They have made their own radio stations, bookstores, schools, bumper stickers, organizations, clubs, and the list goes on and on.  From their eyes, it is a great thing; it keeps their kids sheltered from "the dangers of the real world," and it keeps their family focused on the most important thing, a relationship with God.  Yes, I would agree that this relationship is important, but what good does a Christian do if they are sheltered in this "bubble" of Christianity so that they cannot reach the people who need it most?  The Bible says in Matthew 28:19, "Therefore, go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit."  This clearly shows that the followers who are so wrapped up in keeping to "their kind" have been misled, and should maybe refer back to their main source of reasoning for some real answers.

Some people of the Christian faith have the wrong idea of how to raise their family, therefore giving those looking in the wrong image of all Christians.  Some people who raise their children in orderly ways, putting heavy rules and regulations on all of their children's actions, give the impression that if you are part of this religion, you can have no fun because you have to follow a set number of rules.  Frankly, Christians will set ridiculous rules for their families, making all of us look like plain idiots.  My philosophy is to just let a kid be a kid, let them do what they want to do, but guard their actions and monitor what they are doing.  Putting crazy restrictions on a kid because you think it is "in God's will" will only make the child look ridiculous in the whole scheme of things, and a parent cannot shelter their kid forever.  If a child is pushed to do all of the so called "right things" as a kid, they will be likely to rebel as a teenager.

Non-Christians get the wrong impression of followers all the time because of the things they hear in the news or the things they see with their own eyes.  Recently when Heath Ledger was killed, a so-called "church" protested that "God hates fags, " and "Heath is in hell."  This is something that personally upset me the most because it is something that everyone can see, and it is totally the wrong impression of a Christian.  I Peter 2:17 says, "Respect everyone", and II Peter 1:7 says to show, "brotherly affection with love for everyone."  No matter who you are, a Christian's job is to accept you, and people have somehow become so caught up in the religious lifestyle, forgetting the true meaning of being Christ-like.  People become so caught up in the "image" that their actions become worse than those who they are protesting against in the first place.  The Bible says in Matthew 6:5, "When you pray, don't be like the hypocrites who love to pray publicly on the street corners and in the synagogues where everyone can see them.  I tell you the truth, that is all the reward they will ever get."  This clearly shows that being a Christian is about sharing truth with others, and it is not about building yourself up, but about building others up and bring more people to God.

If only non-believers could look in at Christians and realize that not all of them are the crazy, Bible beating, ridiculous clothes wearing weirdos that they are known as, maybe some people could start to realize that maybe this religion is about love and acceptance and forgiveness.  It is only when that stereotype is forgotten and someone, ironically, shows Christians the light that things will actually change, but until that day, the same things will be going on in our world as they are today.

The heart of a father

I have a story that I just have to tell.  Yesterday was my son Brad's first baseball practice of the year.  I decided this year that I would coach Brad's team to see if I could get him more interested in playing the game.  My older boys Bryson and Brett have always been avid sports fanatics, but Brad is a different breed.  He likes video games and just hanging out with his friends...which are OK.  Angie and I just think that there is some real inherent value in playing team sports.

Anyway, Brad and I have always been close because I understand him.  You would have to know Brad to know what I mean.  He is a complex child and if you don't know his heart and understand him sometimes he can be a challenge.  For me, truthfully, he has always been a joy.  I love him to death and I know he loves and wants to please me too.  For instance, yesterday I put him out in the outfield even though I know he can't catch that well yet.  I didn't think this was a hazard of any type or I wouldn't have done it.  Unfortunately, another coach, not knowing that Brad didn't have much experience catching fly balls, lined one directly at him.  Brad, wanting so desperately to impress me, ran up on the ball to try and catch it and it hit him square in the head.  My initial response was that he was going to have a concussion and that I was probably going to have to take him to the ER for an MRI or CAT scan.  I mean the ball hit him extremely hard.  So hard, in fact, it bounced off his head and landed all the way at the fence behind him.  But Brad didn't fall down.  He didn't cry.  He didn't scream.  No, he just turned and ran and got the ball and threw it in to second base.  When I ran out to see if he was alright, he said, "Dad are you proud of me?"  "Am I getting better?"  "Am I good enough to play on this team?" 

Those words cut me like a knife.  I composed myself though and made sure he was OK and then went back to helping with practice.  On the way home I told Brad what I wanted to tell him when we were on the field.  This is what I said, I said, "Brad, it doesn't matter how good or bad you are, in my book you are and always will be good enough.  You have what it takes Brad!  You're my son and I love you."  I could tell when I said it, he knew I meant it.  I mean, I made sure that I looked square in his eyes so that he would understand the heart and passion that I have for him.  Brad is my boy and I could care less how good or bad he is at anything.  He will always be on my team.

After I spoke those words there was nothing else said the whole way home.  Brad just sat there quietly looking out the window.  Meanwhile, I quietly prayed a prayer of thanks that he was OK.  I also thanked God that the way I love my son is the way He loves me.  I don't have to be "good" enough.  He loves me just like I am. That's the heart of a father. 

Off To Watch My Homeboys Beat Glenn....

                           Go Spartans!

This one is for Brett

Most of you that read my blog already know that I have 4 kids.  I have Brianna who is 16.  Bryson who is 15.  Brett who is 13.  And then Brad my 8 year old.  Anyway, when you have 4 kids life can be very challenging sometimes.  One of the biggest challenges Angie and I face is dealing with each one of our children's emotional needs.  Brett, has been our biggest challenge lately.

When you study birth order, one of the things they say about middle children is that they have a sense of not belonging.  They fight to receive attention from parents and others because many times they are being ignored.  Being in the middle may cause a child to feel insecure because they may have trouble finding a place in the mix.  This describes Brett to a T. 

Brett has had a hard year.  He is in 7th grade and in the 7th grade girls grow taller than boys.  To make matters worse, Brett has a short dad, me, and so in Brett's mind he wonders if he will ever grow at all.  To compound the problem further, both Brianna and Bryson, his older sister and brother have had a phenomenal year filled with many successes, and while Brett's year hasn't been a failure by any stretch, when your older sister and brother continue to be recognized it can sometimes get hard to stay happy for them.  Brett never complains though.  He just internalizes what he feels and sometimes when he and I are all alone he'll ask me questions like "Dad, do you think I will be taller than you?" or "Dad, am I as good at basketball as Bryson was when he was my age?"  or "Dad, do you think I have a shot at making the team?"  My answer to all those questions is always yes.  What else can it be? 

What I really want Brett to know is how special he is.  I want him to know that it doesn't matter how big he grows to be physically, to me he is a giant because I can see his heart.  And his heart is filled with love for people.  It's filled with kindness.  It's filled with God.  I want him to know that he has a great future ahead and that before the foundation of the world, God had uniquely chosen Brett Bouldin as one of His own to be used for His purposes.  I want him to know that no matter where he goes or what he does, he'll always have a father whose proud of him, not for anything that he's done...but for who he is.  I want him to know that I love him unconditionally and that from the very second he was born he has always been a prized jewel in my life.

Brett...I love you dude!  Hang in there!  Remember, life really is a journey and not a destination.  I hope you are as glad as I am that we are doing it together.

Dad

A Proud Mom and Dad

Brianna and Bryson...Angie and Blake's Jewels!  We love you guys and are proud of you! 

My Children

James Faust said, "No gift bestowed upon us is so precious as children.  They are proof that God still loves us.  They are the hope of the future." 

Tonight is a big night for the Bouldin household.  Two of my kids, that's right, two are on the homecoming court at Sun Valley High School.  Brianna, my 16 year old daughter, and I will walk to center field at halftime as she represents part of the 11th grade court. Brianna is one of those rare children that, I want to say is perfect, because it almost seems like she is.  During these last 16 years it has been rare for Angie or me to ever have to speak to Bri Bri.  She's a hard worker.  She's a great student.  She's a good athlete.  She's the total package.  But above and beyond all I have already mentioned,  Brianna is a committed Christ follower.  I call her "my sunshine" because she, on so many occasions, has been a light in my sometimes dimly lit world.  Whenever I see her smiling face, I have to smile myself because I love her.  Yes I do! (Thanks JT) Tonight it will be a huge honor to hold her hand and walk her out to be a part of something that means a lot to kids her age.

Bryson, my oldest son will also be escorted to mid field tonight by my wife.  I don't know why Sun Valley has a Homecoming King, but they do.  I think it's hilarious.  In fact, last night I was talking to my brother on the phone about it and jokingly asked him, "Weren't you homecoming queen your senior year?"  Maybe it's a generational thing, but homecoming courts were always reserved for pretty girls.  Never the less, I am still proud of my boy! He is obviously not a pretty girl, but he is a wonderful son who is having a pretty phenomenal year.  He is having a great football season (scored again last night). He is making good grades.  He is adjusting well to High School.  Angie and I are so grateful!

James Faust, whoever he is, was right.  No gift bestowed upon us is so precious as our children.  Thank you God for my 4.  Thank you God for memorable moments like we'll have tonight!  I am sure when I look back on times like these years from now, I will long to relive them.  Help me to celebrate and soak up the moments.  Amen.